Communicate not Enumerate

“I'd like to help you in your struggle to be free. There must be 50 ways to leave your lover,” according to Paul Simon.

For me to be free, I need to express myself, on a physical, emotional and spiritual level. My only form of physical express nowadays is my appearance (both me and my website). For emotional and spiritual expression, I am limited to my words (both written and spoken).

I had something else to say, but not today.

Instead, I'll leave you with another set of lyrics.

“All that I wanted, were things I had before
All that I needed, I've never needed more
All of my questions, are answers to my sins
All of my ending, are waiting to begin” - Slipknot, Circle

M.J., I'm Here to Help

Because the Neverland Ranch will bring so many bad memories to M.J., I decided to help him out. I plan on buying the ranch from him, but I am going to change a few of the rules.

Rule 1: Only girls age 18 – 24 are allowed
Rule 2: Everyone gets the 'J' juice
Rule 3: Only girls age 18 – 24 are allowed
Rule 4: I WILL sleep with each and every one of them
Rule 5: Did I mention the girls are over 18?

And the Fortune Cookie Says...

I went to this Japanese place for dinner with a girl (really) and it seems our fortune cookies got mixed up.

Me, loud, emotional, completely obtrusive, with an abrasive personality received this fortune: “ You have a quiet and unobtrusive nature.”

Her, the (I'm not going to say it) received this fortune, “ Your emotional nature is strong & sensitive.”

Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

You cannot avoid it. Eventually it affects you, your life, your peace of mind. Change is a normal occurrence of everyday life and I'm not talking about nickels and dimes, I'm talking about big change (and noooo that's not quarters and 50 cent pieces).

Once you learn to accept it, life can follow some form of normalcy (whatever that may be). I'm not saying that's good or bad, it just is. Unfortunately just as you get used to the last change, it happens again and again and again.

But there is one thing about change that many people do not know about; you don't have to accept it. You can reject change. Maybe not all the time, but you definitely can do it some of the time. And once you start to reject change, you can then achieve some form of normalcy.

So no matter what you do, accept it or reject – change will happen and life will settle down for a while.

Why am I even talking about this? Because I've been through change; big change. I've reached some level of acceptance and peacefulness about it and I'm NOT ready to do it again.

Got it?!

Promises and Hope

Fortune Cookie Says: there are plenty of promises & hope floating around you.

RegisJack.com Virtual Fortune Cookie (RVFC) Says: there are plenty of (broken) promises & (false) hope floating around (taunting) you.

Exclusive Don't Mean Nothing To Me

To everyone that spent the time and money to be the Star Wars Celebration III Darth Vader Figure because it was so exclusive (which meant you could only get it at CIII or later on the web site) - here is what I did to mine.

Let me introduce to you,
The Super Exclusive 'Regis Jack' Star Wars Celebration III Deformed Vader Figure.

And "Yes," I did violently tear the head off the vader figure to replace it with the larger foam head.

Next I'm going to modify the phrases that it says. I'm looking for the soundbite, "This is CNN"

Tastes Like Clorox Smells

In my opinion, life is not worth living. But spending 5 days in Indianapolis at Star Wars Celebration III (aka CIII) has changed my outlook (temporarily of course).

CIII was the ultimate experience. And this is coming from someone who never attended CI or CII or was a very large Star Wars fan in the first place. I really liked the movies, but I didn't consider myself a large fan (and I'm not talking about my weight). Before CIII, I thought the people who dressed up in costumes were just plain weird, but now – let's just say for the next one, I plan on being a stormtrooper.

I was going to go into grave detail about what happened during CIII, but I was told what happens at CIII stays at CIII. So, I'll just summarize.

The Players: A friend (the big Star Wars fan), A friend of a friend (whom I previously met on a few occasions and a member of the 501st), and A complete stranger (who is a friend of the friend of a friend and the director of some documentary called Heart of an Empire). Oh yes, and per definition, we are all men.

The Drive From NC to IN: Although we spent over 9 hours driving to CIII, it was clear after a few hours that were all going to get along very well. Which was good considering we were going to spend 4 days in a hotel room together and would have to drive back. There were a few incidents on the way, including:

• Tailgating a flatbed loaded with a large metal beam and seeing how close we could get to the beam without touching the windshield.
  


• An incident involving a unisex public restroom and a lock that didn't quite work ('nuff said)
  


• A seemingly psychotic breakdown of one of the passengers as he uttered into nothingness, “Home...Home...This isn't good” (turns out he has a wireless headset for his cell phone and it takes voice commands)
  


• Numerous stories (which should never be repeated).
  


• Re-design of the website for Heart of an Empire by Matt
  


• Cruising around the hotel several times in circles trying to figure out where the hell to park the van.
  


• A lot of swearing (that's just because I spoke)
  


• Saw the footage of Heart of an Empire that would be shown in 2 panels during CIII (click here for a review on starwars.com).
  


• Waiting in my first line at Steak-and-Shake
  

The Days and Nights of CIII:

All the days and nights seem to meld together, but here are a few of the highlights: (keep in mind there there was roughly 30,000 people at the convention)

• Waiting in line almost 4 hours the first day just to get into CIII (and there were people much farther back then we were).
  

• Lined up at 5am on day 2, just to get into CIII
  


• Saw tons of people in costumes – saw Darth Vaders, Storm Troopers, Clone Troopers, Fem Troopers, the Elvis Trooper (only 1 of those exist), Imperial Officers, Jedi, Emperor Palpatines, General Grievous', Lukes, Leahs, Slave Leahs (which attract an excessive amount of attention), Chewys and dozens of other characters I couldn't begin to name.
  


• Waiting in line for almost 6 hours to buy CIII stuff including the “CIII Exclusive” Vader figure (which I plan on running over with my car and posting the results on my website).
  


• Saw clips of Episode III, B-actors, and other really cool stuff.
  


• Met lots of interesting people while waiting in line.
  


• Learned there is nothing more intimidating then a storm trooper pointing his gun at you and saying, “Move along”.
  


• Was within inches of meeting George Lucas, but it turns we were being punked.
  


• Had an attractive girl talk to me in the mall – I'm not sure what happened, I blacked out once she spoke.
  


• May have had sex (but it has been so long, I don't remember how it goes)
  


• Slept with a director of some documentary (ok, it was just sleeping in the same hotel room)
  


• Helped out with setup on the 2 panels for Heart of an Empire.
  


• Spread the word about Heart of an Empire and even carried the poster around the convention center.
  


• Learned about the 501st and the work they do.
  


• Also discovered I need to build my own Storm Trooper costume and join the 501st.
  


• Updates made to Heart of an Empire website by Matt
  

The Drive From IN to NC:

• More stories (which should never be repeated)
  


• A lot of swearing (that's just because I spoke)
  


• Snow
  


• More Updates made to Heart of an Empire website by Matt
  


• Recap of all the experiences of the past 5 days (never to be spoken again)
  

All in all, the trip was the most awesome experience I have had for as long as I can remember (although the birth of my son may be a close 2nd). I would definitely do it again.

And if I didn't mention it, see “Heart of an Empire”, a documentary on the 501st, to be in theaters in 2006.